In one of the most cringeworthy and humiliating showcase games the NFL has ever had the privilege to air, the Steelers play host to the New England Patriots tonight on Amazon Prime. Jeff Bezos might be reconsidering his NFL deal with this matchup, which features two of the worst offenses of the Modern NFL era. Coming off their beatdown at the hands of the Arizona Cardinals, the Steelers roll with Mitch Trubisky, who has no choice but to be an upgrade over Kenny Pickett.
His counterpart wouldn’t even start for Mitch’s UNC Tar Heels, as Bailey Zappe gets the nod for the New England Patriots. The Total sits at 30.5, resembling an Iowa Hawkeyes game, and even that seems too high. Bill Belichick and the Patriots have lost 3 straight games, all while holding opponents to 10 points or less!! Unbelievable statistics for any football team above the pop warner level.
There are no signs that point to New England being able to figure things out offensively, as they lost their lone bright spot in Rhamondre Stevenson last week. Devonta Parker and the rest of the Pats receiving corps are consistently less open than bars in Boston after 2 AM, and even when they do break free, there’s no one who can get the ball to them. Rumors are swirling that Malik Cunningham has been taking reps in practice, but we can’t expect anything from someone who has yet to earn playing time on a team this bad.
Firing Matt Canada did wonders for Pittsburgh for about 10 minutes, but the reality is Kenny Pickett was never the guy. Unfortunately for the people of Pittsburgh, Trubisky getting thrown into the fire against a Patriots D won’t bring much more firepower. Miraculously, Mike Tomlin has this team in playoff position, and a win tonight will go a long way towards getting bounced in the first round.
While there have to be better things to do on a Thursday Night than watch this slog of a football game, we know real ones will be tuned in to watch their action. I have a couple of different plays in this one tonight, all relying on minimal points being scored. Let’s hope these teams continue trending how they have been, the Patriots can hold down a top draft pick, and we can cash some bets heading into the weekend.